Hi!
I have been dying to write that “Hi!” for months. This time, for a different reason. Not because of guilt (I have stopped feeling bad for this blog since I decided to give up journaling in every kind of medium), but simply because I need to let things off my head.
Letting things off your head? Twitter will do in a snap, why don’t you just tweet it out? Yeah…it’s more like tending my own creative outlet than merely ranting… but wait, isn’t that what Instagram does for you? Well, yeahhhh….
It’s just that I miss writing posts for myself, and I miss being immersed in things other than my work or personal stuff. I left this blog hanging in 2016. Actually, I wrote two posts after the last Random Shots post (that have been removed because they are too...personal). I have removed other "sensitive talk" posts too because I don't think I need to display too much negativity here. We have Twitter for that. Hehe.
Weeks ago, I read someone saying that having a hobby will make you more productive. Drawing is no longer just a hobby - it's mostly work now. I'm too busy lazy to discover another hobby, and probably too poor cheap for that (do you know how much a calligraphy kit costs??). So, blogging it is. My old love.
Why did I even leave it in the first place, though?
Instagram, of course, does take a part. The second I was typing this, kak Clara of Lucedale instantly popped up in my head - she has been sharing her daily stories on Instagram Stories and I wonder if she's still active on her blog. I bet bloggers I admired back in my uni days share the same struggle to keep up with their blogs and apparently, I'm right. I relate to kak Clara's story about her unfinished drafts and chase for perfection. Kak Diana apologizing to hot chocolate and mint for choosing Instagram is me apologizing to this blog. Given the condition that they are mothers now and have businesses to take care of, clearly it's much harder to find a quiet moment to sit and write. I love that both of them mentioned they talked to the husbands about the guilt and conflict, which I also did with my fiancé (yes I have one now...). He read my blog after the first time we met two years ago, and has been encouraging me to write more.
I think some of us have reached the point where we think that sometimes Instagram could be tiring, because of its pace and everything. If Instagram is a big, overcrowded, hustlin' and bustlin' city, I imagine blog as a slow rural town where your small and charming cottage is, that you visit to seek some peace.
It takes me 5 years - being the last one is my first year of freelancing full-time - to wholeheartedly realize that I need to be fueled by my blog. I need my blog to find a reason to like myself. I need my blog to ged distracted from trash thoughts. I need my blog to stay creative.
I will always find a time to write something here.
Song listened: the bird and the bee's discography (+ rain sound)
